Tomorrow we finally (finally!) go in for our blood test. I am so ready for good news, today has been a bit of a rotten apple. First, I was feeling a little too eager this morning and decided to test with one of my internet cheapies. Definitely not a brilliant move since I got a blindingly white big fat negative. It's really difficult to sort out how I'm feeling, between trying to think positive and the progesterone making me feel nuts, I'm not optimistic about the blood test tomorrow. It could still be too early for a pregnancy to show on a urine test, but I would have killed to see two little lines.
After the negative test, I got to enjoy a generous helping of cramps all morning. I didn't want to take anything just in case I am pregnant, so I just waited for them to fizzle out. Luckily they were gone by around 11am so they weren't too awful. This of course leads me to - what does it mean? My period? A pregnancy? Progesterone? Who knows!
In an attempt to improve the morning, I stopped and got some Coffee Bean for E and I. E got a Vanilla Ice Blended (so jealies) and I got a sugar free Chai Tea Latte with almond coconut milk. Mine was quite tasty, but I have a strong preference for cold drinks (not allowed - boo) and it was over 80 here today. I was just starting to recover from the cramps and was making some omelets for breakfast when bam, that miserably familiar stomach pain (not the gallbladdery awful pain, that achy abdomen pain that pops up every few days). I have no idea where this pain comes from - it's best described as abdominal pain rather than a stomach ache and if I had to guess, I'd say it's probably from the progesterone. That drug is awful. It's almost 5pm here and it's just starting to go away, which means I've been miserable for 6 hours. Ugh.
Add in the general gross feeling of progesterone "squishiness", the fact that I can't have sex with my husband (see aforementioned nasty progesterone), and today has been an all around sucky day. My mind has been running to our next steps -IUI #2/ IVF, and now I'm wondering how soon we could get started on the Fragile X probe. If our blood test is negative tomorrow, I wonder if we could start the probe process early since it takes a couple months to make. I know they're going to need DNA from my sister and I, but there's no way they're going to get DNA from my sperm donor who passed on my lovely premutation. Damn, I was so hopefully that this IUI would work and we wouldn't have to go there.
Eff you stupid negative pee test. Eff you and your stupid one line.
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