Happy Holidays 2014

Milou wishes everyone a Happy Holiday!

Here we are, the day before Christmas Eve, and I've been so busy running around that I haven't written about any of the things we've been doing. Assuming everything checks out at my next baseline appointment, today should be my last birth control only day! Come Christmas Eve, I'll be taking my birth control and doing my first Lupron injection ever, since I somehow never had Lupron in my IVF stim protocols. It looks like it will be a miniscule dose, 10 units at first and then down to 5 units, it almost doesn't seem worth the needle stick. I'm sure the injections won't be bad and I'll fall right back into the habit of sticking my belly.

In more festive news, we once again managed to find a magnificently fat Noble fir to be our Jew Tree this year. This baby was over 10 feet with the stand and I actually had to trim the tall top to stand it up. We decked it out per usual in blue and white lights and I seriously considered sticking some IVF ornaments on there, but ultimately didn't want to give anything away to visitors. Once we got it all set up and decorated, my sister posed most artfully like a little mermaid, with Milou in perfect position wearing her scarf. I attempted to pose for a couple photos, trying to minimize my still massive belly but had little luck. Milou's photo bomb is pretty adorable though, she recognizes my iPhone and knows to smile when it's pointed at her.

 

I didn't have much luck on the floor either courtesy of a Cillian photo bomb so I gave it up as a bad job. At least my Harry Potter Daily Prophet leggings were fabulous, I think I might wear them again tomorrow to my appointment. I will probably have one more pre-cycle appointment (read: not included in the base fee, of course) before I start the Estrace. If all goes well, give or take a few days, we should be on track for a January 16th transfer!

Happy Holidays everyone. My dearest wish for this holiday season is that this be the last Hanukkah/Christmas E and I spend without children. Come this time next year, I want to be holding our long awaited Frostie A as a healthy baby. This transfer IS going to work!

Christmas Delays?!?!

Originally, I was planning on putting an embryo back straight away after this IVF cycle. I psyched myself all up for a November transfer and told myself I'd have good news for the holidays. I was ready to go, let's get this embryo toasty warm in my uterus!

Then, Dr. D put the kibosh on that. He said I've been injecting waaay too much medication into my body, two months in a row, and that wouldn't make for the most ideal environment for our embryo. Damn. He suggested that we take a wash cycle, wait for the drugs to really leave my system and start fresh with a nice, fresh cycle. Okay, I don't love the idea of waiting yet another month, but I would never do anything to jeopardize the success of my frosties so I got on board. One wash cycle to get everything out and THEN we'd thaw out a frostie and put it back.

With a regular cycle, it's pretty easy to plan when things should be happening. With this period showing up right on time I was pretty much positive that we'd be doing our transfer shortly after Christmas, probably sometime around the 28th if Dr. D really planned on transferring on CD 17. I've heard some people transfer later, closer to CD 20 or 22 but Dr. D said CD 17 so that's what I went with. I psyched myself up again for a Christmas transfer told myself I'd have wonderful news around January 9th. A September baby would be wonderful, right before the holidays really started to pick up.

I was reading through my IVF support group, reminding myself to practice patience when I read about some clinics closing for the holidays and delaying treatments. This should have been obvious, of course they'd want to go on holiday, but my clinic couldn't be closing because I'm transferring right after Christmas, right?  Right??

Nooooooo!!!

I got on the phone to Dr. D's nurse and asked them about their Christmas schedule. Bam, my worst fears were confirmed. They usually close for two weeks spanning the end of December to the beginning of January. Fuck. Right over when I was supposed to be doing my transfer. Double Fuck.

I explained to the nurse that I was supposed to be transferring over that time period and wasn't expecting my period to start until December 12th. She elaborated that the ART center closes completely for those two weeks but there's still a crew on the clinic side. The last day for most things is December 18th and there are only certain days after that where they can perform specific procedures. This is probably for those people who need to stim longer than expected and need their retrieval done over those two weeks, not for people who are looking to transfer a frozen embryo that's perfectly happy waiting on ice.

She told me to call with the first day of my period and we would see how things look then but it looks like we'll be delayed yet another month. I was just getting used to the idea of taking one month off and now we have to take two. I told my acupuncturist S how disappointed I was and she said that success rates are lower around Christmas because people are stressed out so I wouldn't want to transfer then anyway, but I'm pretty sure she was just trying to make me feel better. I don't see out of town family members or deal with a lot of family drama over Christmas so I'm fairly certain that my chances wouldn't be any lower just because it's the holidays.  My frostie certainly doesn't know it's Christmas.

All I want for Christmas is a batch of healthy embryos! One in my belly and the rest on ice.

If we have to wait two months, we won't get to transfer until the end of January, probably around the 25th. This means that I would potentially be getting good (because I refuse to believe otherwise) news on my birthday. It would be a wonderful birthday gift but I'm so anxious to get an embryo back where it belongs. This process takes so long and every month more feels like forever.

SA Number 5, Christmas Hope??

We just got E's 5th semen analysis back and we are SO confused! I have been shoving supplements down E's throat  encouraging E to take FertilAid for Men, Count Boost for Men and Motility Boost for Men for the past few months and I can't believe they might actually be working. Keep in mind E's hormone levels have always been perfect, so its not like the supplements could correct something that wasn't broken, and we still don't have the results of his genetic testing yet, but look!

SA 1 at Lab A: 0.65 million, 0 motility
SA 2 at Lab B: 0
SA 3 at Lab C: 0
SA 4 at Lab C: 10 million, 0 motility
SA 5 at Lab C: 23 million, 0 motility

Again his doctor doesn't seem to be too enthused, he ordered another SA for him and said we should focus on my procedures tomorrow. The motility is still, and has always been, 0 and the morphology is always N/A, I think because they're don't grade them if they're not moving. We're trying not to get our hopes up since 23 million dead sperm are no more useful than 1 dead sperm, and they might still be genetically defective, but we're so so glad to see the number moving impossibly upwards!

Tomorrow is the HSG and saline ultrasound, I'm not expecting to see anything wrong on either test so hopefully our goodish news streak will continue. 

Merry Christmas Everyone!

Jew Tree 2013

This year Hanukkah was so freakishly early that it barely felt like the holidays. We didn't have our tree in time, because who has trees before Thanksgiving? and all our gifts were stored on the top of the living room Armoire. It was pretty sad. Because of the rather pathetic holiday spirit in our house, and the fact that Hanukkah was over on December 4th, it was suggested that we might forgo our tree this year. 

Not having a tree probably wouldn't have been awful, but it's one of the only holiday traditions that E and I have carried with us from house to house. It doesn't feel like the holidays without it, and with all the TTC crap we're dealing with, it turns out it means a lot to have that little symbol of the holidays in our home.

So, E and I began looking. We checked out our usual lot, as well as a handful of others, and nothing was looking right. Our environmentally friendly tree lot, Santa and Sons, had gorgeous trees, but they were all around $200+. The smaller lots had better prices, but really shoddy, sad looking trees. I was starting to get pretty discouraged when I happened upon a Groupon for Mr. Jingles, $35 for $70. Most of their trees weren't "perfect" either and E was starting to lobby for us leaving when bam! there he was. Propped up against the fence in a corner of the lot with a big gnarly bush in front of it, was a gorgeous, hugely fat Noble Fir. E was pretty sure he'd be too big for the space, being nearly as wide as he was tall, but I was in love and he was perfect.

 

Don't let the size comparison fool you! Our tree is a little shorter than normal this year, but the super helpful tree lot guy was 6'5" and he's standing on a little ledge here. E was still pretty hesitant but, helpful again, the tree lot guy sealed the deal for us. Instead of buying the Groupon, because Groupon would take a cut, tree lot guy suggested he just give us the discount as is. He also quoted us the tree at the 7-8 foot price, so instead of $115, our tree was $45. They would even put our Santa and Son's stand on the tree for us. E was sold. 

  

Giddy with our tree purchase, another Mr. Jingles employee loaded him up and we set off to make the very short trip home. I think we got maybe one or two blocks around the corner before we started to seriously regret not purchasing at Santa and Sons. While we love the tree, it was crystal clear that the lot guy had absolutely no idea how to tie it down. We had to stop over and over to tighten the increasingly slack, thin cords, while the tree slipped further and further back and I held onto it out the passenger window. It was an experience I have no desire to repeat and we were so glad to get our tree home in one piece.  Lesson learned: at least where tree tying experience is concerned, you get what you pay for.  Our Santa and Sons trees never budged on a journey 4 times as long. 

Finally we got our beauty home, squeezed him through the front door and stood him on his thankfully sturdy stand. Another surprise awaited us when I realized that our water absorbing floor pad had been peed on by a cat, so we covered the floor with tarp before putting down towels. This system works well for us, it protects the floor from any spills and allows us to fold up the towels and shake out any needles when it's time for the tree to come down. My sister L usually partakes in the tree trimming, so E and I wound our 5 million lights around the tree and waited for L to come over and help with the ornaments. 

All things considered, our 2013 Jew tree has turned out to be a surprising success. Fat and bushy, he fits perfectly in our tree space and looks gorgeous decked out in all our ornaments. I can't speak to his longevity, though I suspect he won't last until February like a Santa and Sons tree, but we are so glad he didn't fall off the top of my car.

Happy Holidays 2012

Milou in her holiday bow. She's so patient with me haha.

Today, we finally set up our annual Jew Tree! It took 5 trips to various tree lots over 3 days before we finally settled on a gorgeous Noble Fir from our usual vendor, Santa and Sons. The other trees were too skinny, too holey, too crooked and too short. Santa and Sons are always a bit more expensive than other lots, but their trees are healthy, lush, environmentally friendly and long lasting so we decided it was worth it to pay a bit more. Plus, we had finally found "our" tree, and had that moment where we knew it was coming home with us.

This year, we had E's step dad's truck to help us get it home, and it was such a nice change to not drive over the canyon with the tree top hanging over the windshield of my tiny Jetta. It further solidified my growing love of larger cars, even though I used to be a diehard mini cooper coveter, and made things so much easier.

My sister L and Milou in front of our tree

The house smells so good and already feels festive and happy! It's like it fills the air with holiday cheer and the glowing lights make everything feel warmer and cozier. We added some seriously amazing R2D2 lights this year that I scored on sale while visiting my friend El in Boise and a new tree skirt to help complete the look. 

Tintin and Milou. Milou thinks Tintin's bow is HILARIOUS.

I hope everyone has a wonderful Holiday season, however you choose to celebrate it.

Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas everyone! Wishing health and happiness to you and yours