25 Years

Although this is a little belated, I figured I'd post it anyway since I have so many unpublished entries in my blog graveyard. 

So this past February 5th was my 25th birthday. It's hard to believe that I've hit that quarter of a century milestone when I feel both so much older and so much younger. Twenty five? That's it? Most days I feel about 35, ready for a different stage in life. But then I think wow, twenty five, I'm already a quarter of the way (if I'm lucky) through my life. Only three more of these to go and I don't know if that will be enough. E and I are now closer to 30 than we are 20 and there's so much I want to accomplish before that next milestone rushes up and catches us unawares.

I woke up on my birthday and took care of my sweet Haji. It seems no matter what that cat did, how many shoes he peed in or nights he spent hours stubbornly scratching at basement door in the middle of the night, I could never be anything less than exasperated and amused with him. It hurts even more that losing him was so intimately tied with such an aging milestone, as if I have to embark on the next phase of life and I can't take him with me. After he died, my mom told me she thought his passing signaled the end of my childhood, although I think she was just trying to get in a dig about applying to medical school. I always thought that he too would make it to twenty five, even though in hindsight it was clear he wasn't doing well this past year. If I'd been asked though, I would have never said he'd be gone before his sixteenth birthday.  Missing him feels like not being able to catch my breath around the heaviness in my chest.

After Haji was settled comfortably in his heated bed (at least he had it good right up until the end), I met a friend from out of town for a wonderful and unexpected meal at one of my favorite breakfast places, The Griddle. We got delicious, and massive, cinnamon pancakes which I highly recommend you try with at least one-three other people to help you, and spent the morning catching up on the last few years.  Aside from my wedding, I hadn't seen her since high school and it was wonderful to see how we still clicked even though we're at different places in our lives.

Recess Time Pancakes

Unlike most of my birthdays where I planned every last detail myself, this birthday I left entirely up to E. Although he leaned a little heavily on his mom, he planned a lovely dinner in the Marina and we had an intimate dinner with family and friends. There was, of course, a few things that didn't go quite right. Overly generous C let me order our shared steak rarer than he would eat, there an unnecessary bout of squabbling over who was supposed to be contributing to the bill, but everything sorted itself out in the end. More importantly, I got spend time with E, my awesome friends and my favorite little person ever, Roxie, who took great pleasure in pointing out all the boats on the water and candles in the restaurant.

It was impossible to not have a wonderful birthday evening with such good company.