My honey's father has been essentially impossible to get ahold of. His father and mother have been divorced since my honey was 3, but my honey spent his summers and school breaks with his father. Even growing up there were problems with his father's fanatical changing hobbies and lifestyles. He decided to only eat organic before there were organic options, and tried to keep my honey from having birthday cake at his friend's parties. He changes careers like tissues and is always taking classes so he doesn't have to pay back his student loans. At one point growing up my honey refused to call him daddy, dad or father, and his pediatrician had to call his father and say you need to stop, you're alienating your child.
While I'm grateful to this man for contributing to my honey's existence, he is fast becoming a major contender on my shit list. I have extremely strong protective instincts, and seeing my honey upset is making my stomach churn and want to throttle this guy. He has ignored phone calls, text messages, facebook messages, and every other method of communication we can think of. We don't have his address (part of the problem) so we can't show up in person. Not only do we need to inform him formally of our engagement (more formal than a facebook message, text message, and phone message), we also need to get the addresses of family members from his side. His wife is quite charming and if I could just get ahold of her I'm sure she would give us the needed information, but we only have his cell phone.
For some reason, my honey can't let go of his asshole father. My own father is a train wreck, but at least I have no illusions about his role not in my life. Every New Years, Hanukkah, Father's Day, Birthday etc my honey calls, leaves messages, and facebooks his father to say I love you. Every holiday that jack ass ignores him. When he does get ahold of him, it's all "oh yeah, we should get together, sure, come by soon" and then he never follows up.
His father recently had a family reunion with his side of the family in Hawaii and not only did he not invite my honey, he didn't even tell him about it. We found out when he posted the pictures on facebook of the big Hawaiian reunion and it really pissed me off that he would exclude his child, the closest family member you can have.
I don't know how much more I can take from this guy before I explode. I'm ready to call it quits on him, but my honey desperately wants him to be there. For his sake he had better get his ass to our wedding or this mama bear is going to be hunting him down and it's not going to be pretty.
